Saturday, June 24, 2023

Hollywood Rat Race!


Hollywood Rat Race by Ed Wood Jr. is not a very exciting book. Overall I'd rate it as somewhat dull, but it does have its redeeming features. The book is really two things at once, a guide for wannabe Hollywood stars and starlets giving them a Woods-eye view of what it's like to break into the movie business. As you might guess from the title, Wood is not puffing up the experience, in fact you'd have to say he's trying his best (in his own weird way) of pushing them away from the idea of rushing to "Tinsel Town" straight out of high school and blowing whatever money they have by being unprepared for the requirements of the business. This is a book aimed to smarten them up. 

(Ed Wood, a dame and the devil of Hollywood)

In the first six or so chapters of the book, Wood details the varied and bountiful pitfalls of trying to land a job in Hollywood. Unscrupulous producers and tricksters of all stripes are just waiting for new prey to get off the busses from across the American landscape eager to strip what little money they might bring to the city to sustain them. Even if a budding starlet escapes those clutches, getting to see a legit producer is mostly impossible without an agent, and just hope you get an honest one. Even with an agent there are costs of potential wardrobe and headshots. Just living takes money and night jobs are the recommendation. Wood uses his own experiences and those of other wannabes as examples of what can go wrong. In this section the reader can have a blast counting how many times Wood mentions angora sweaters. It's a lot. 

(Roy Barcroft and Kenne Duncan)

The rest of the book is rich with Wood's fond memories of veteran character actors he's worked with over the years. He has great respect for Kenne Duncan, Roy Barcroft, and Reed Howes in particular. These guys are the kind of actor who last in Hollywood because they learned the game and fulfilled a need that the studios had for villains and men with singular talents. Later Wood describes how he and  Tor Johnson joined a Baptist church to raise money for Graverobbers from Outer Space (the working title of Plan 9 from Outer Space.)

(Bela Lugosi and Ed Wood)

But the absolute best part of the book is when Wood talks about Bela Lugosi. If Hollywood Rat Race had the grace and wit and charm shown in the stories of Bela and how Wood helped arrange a comeback of sorts for him in his declining years, it would be a delightful book. Instead of Wood yammering and imagining angora, we get him actually creating scenes with deft care and succeeding making the experiences some alive. The section is all too short, but it is wonderful nonetheless, filled with heart. 


The book was written sometime in the mid 60's, since Wood mentions his film Orgy of the Dead will soon be coming out and that happened more or less in 1965. Alas the book would not be published until 1998 long after Wood's demise in the late 70's.  One odd feature is that Wood rails on about how nudity should be used only to advance a story when he's just helped create a movie which is pretty much a strip show on celluloid. I cannot recommend Hollywood Rat Race to anyone save a Wood fan, but for us it's ultimately worth the effort. 

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2 comments:

  1. The "dame" in your photo above is Dolores Fuller, who was Ed's live-in girl friend for a couple of years and starred in a few of his films, including Glen or Glenda?. Wood wanted to marry her, but it is said that she wouldn't because of his drinking and "those other things". She also was a songwriter, and Elvis even recorded about a dozen of her songs!

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    1. I couldn't remember her name I was too lazy to look it up. Thanks. Isn't there a funky scene with her and the lead chick in Bride of the Monster. That might be my favorite of Ed's stuff aside from Plan 9. Bela and Tor are chewing the scenery, and based on what I saw you literally could chew it.

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