Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Schoolhouse Glock!


In a world where dumb ideas rain down like leaves in Autumn, the latest call for teachers to wander the halls of schools locked and loaded is without question the dumbest yet. Here's what one "lawmaker" suggests.

In a country where teaching as a profession has been derided for over a decade now (in an effort to demolish the union of course) suddenly we discover that teachers who can't be trusted not to infuse kids with the teachings of Lenin and Marx, and who can't be trusted not prey on their young charges for sexual gratification, can suddenly be trusted to carry weaponry into a school on a regular basis.

It's stupid.

There is hardly a day goes by at my school when an e-mail doesn't circulate in which someone has lost their keys or cellphone or something. Now just add Glock 26 or Walther PPS to that list. Sheesh! I've worked with these people. They are decent folks by and large, some excellent well-meaning and exceedingly accomplished characters. But most of them shouldn't be close to damn gun.

I'm against "conceal and carry" laws. I'm not against owning guns by any means. I own a gun. I've carried a handgun on my hip when I've worked as a security guard. That's what I think folks should be required to do. No more "conceal" just "carry".  If you want to carry a handgun, then it should be in plain sight. No hiding it, so that I as a mere potential target cannot know what I'm up against. No hidden agendas, no secret guns.

If it's the Old West folks want to hearken back to, then let 'em. Put on full-blown holsters and wear the guns out in the open. If you hide it, it occurs to me you might be up to no good. Let everyone make up their own mind about you as you wander the streets with a "hog leg" dangling on your hip. Why be ashamed of exerting your constitutional right?

And as for guns in schools. If they must be there, then I recommend a gun cabinet in the Media Center (once upon a time in the dusty past called the "Library") and let's put the Librarian in charge. We could train student aides to clean and oil them in case they are needed in a hurry. We can keep the guns next to the overhead projectors and extra television sets. When danger threatens, the staff can report promptly and pick up their weapon of choice. Extra ammo will keep safely enough next to the Expo markers and extra No.2 pencils in the Teachers' lounge. That should just about take care of it. Nothing can possibly go wrong there.

Lord have mercy!

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6 comments:

  1. I, too, work in a school and the image of our Librarian signing out weapons like she signs out televisions actually made me chuckle....and I needed that!

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    1. All you can do is laugh at some of these suggestions. It reveals how little folks know about how schools actually function.

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  2. Plus, do you really want to supply weapons to employees whose salaries and benefits you've just cut during contract negotiations (and then crowed in public about how you taught them a lesson, like in Chicago)?

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    1. Yeah, you'd figure they'd be loathe to arm all the Marxists in the system, just empowering the revolution.

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  3. We must have something like 500,000 armed police officers in the United States, who are trained in using the firearms they carry with them on duty and practice on a regular basis. That's why you never ever hear of a police officer being shot and killed. Oh wait, no, in fact fifty to seventy police officers die from being shot in this country every year. It turns out that having guns and knowing how to use them still didn't magically protect them from being shot! And suddenly every teacher in America is going to become a more skilled gun user than any police officer?

    These NRA-loving idiots need to step out of the movie theater and stop pretending their fevered imaginations have any connection with real life.

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    1. People talk how movies influence the folks who commit these crimes, and they have a point. But they forget how movies influence the way they themselves understand the nature of the problem and what might be a possible fix. Unreality all around.

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